How I Avoid a Cold

A coworker of mine was recently very sick.  She had just been feeling under the weather, but throughout the day at work, she started feeling much worse.  Even though she left early, by the time she left she had a fever over 103 degrees.  She was also not the only person in the office who was sick, many others have had varying degrees of cold symptoms, and so I had been widely exposed.

I came home from work the next day and felt a suspicious congestion in my throat and the early signs of a sinus headache.  I am prone to sinus infections and I get very anxious when those first signs start to appear.

I then proceeded to take the precautionary course of prevention and treatment that has now worked three times in a row where I have started to feel like I was coming down with something and managed to avoid it.

The first thing I did was get myself a few things from the store.  I bought Mucinex, both in liquid and tablet form.  I prefer the liquid for effectiveness but I prefer the tablets to bring to work.  I follow the dosing instructions carefully because if you maintain the proper dosage the mucous doesn\’t have the chance to build up.  I also got myself some Airborne.  In the past, I have used the effervescent tablets, but this time I got the gummies instead which taste a lot better.  I also got the Zicam nasal spray that is designed to shorten a cold.  Finally, I always have Grapefruit Seed Extract in capsule form at home.  GSE is a natural antiviral and antibacterial.

I would take the GSE first thing in the morning and right before bed.  I would do the same with the Airborne gummies and the nasal spray.  I took the Mucinex throughout the day.  Also, I got in one hard, sweaty workout, followed by a hot shower and a hearty meal.  I have long since found that getting the body temperature up seems to help – so long as you aren\’t already truly sick because then it makes it worse.

I did this routine for a few days and I am feeling 100% with no sign of catching what my coworker had.  I have found this course of prevention far easier to do than curing a sinus infection or a hacking cough.  I have asthma, and even though it is well controlled, getting a chest cold also makes me very nervous, so it is worth it to work toward prevention, especially during cold and flu season.

There is no doubt that healthy meals, lots of rest and proper hydration play a role in this as well, the supplements are just a boost to basic healthy habits that create a good immune system.  However, this combination has now helped me several times and I feel like I have a large degree of confidence in it.  Also, I find the preventative treatment options far easier on my body than a round of antibiotics or other medication if I do get sick.

I caution anyone to talk to their doctor and to do some research before starting any course of treatment.  Even natural supplements like GSE can have side effects or interactions with other medications that you are taking.

What I Took From the Justice League Movie

My husband took me to see Justice League this weekend for a date.  I am pretty sure we both have a crush on Gal Gadot, and he will sell me on any movie that Henry Cavill is in to get me to go.  I am not a movie buff by any means, and 10 years ago I wouldn\’t have known the difference between DC and Marvel, but here we are.  I have to laugh knowing how marriage has changed me!

The movie was definitely good, and there were some moments where I burst out laughing and for me, that is the key, I love funny!  
First of all, I was very impressed with Aquaman.  Honestly, I thought he had some of the best moments in the movie, and after all of the jokes on Big Bang Theory about how lame Aquaman is, I was surprised because they made him very cool in Justice League!  Secondly, Henry Cavill did not disappoint.  I think he is so well suited for this role.
My biggest take away was a principle of leadership.  That\’s right, even in a fun date night movie about fictitious superheroes, there was a true lesson to be learned here.  I usually only really see these types of learning moments in football movies, so it caught me a little off guard!
I don\’t want to give away any spoilers so I\’ll speak in general terms.  There are so many aspects of leadership, so many qualities we hope to discover in our leaders, and because of this, there are many types of leaders with many different sets of traits.  Different leaders are suited for different situations, and because good leaders are always authentic, there\’s not a standard formula for good leadership.
But good leaders are always willing to rise up, be decisive and take responsibility for the course they take.  Sometimes decisions will prove to be the wrong ones.  Nobody is perfect, and even the best leader is going to make mistakes sometimes.  Sometimes those mistakes are costly.  And that is when leadership is even more important, to be able to take responsibility.
I have heard too many so-called leaders say, \”I don\’t want the responsibility.\”  Or, \”Someone needs to step up and take charge, but not me.\”  Or even, \”I don\’t want to be the one responsible for this when it goes wrong.\”
If we are going to call yourselves leaders, we need to stop looking to the left and right and hoping someone else will do the hard job.  We need to stop thinking, \”well, if they won\’t then I won\’t either.\”  And we need to stop letting past mistakes hold us back.
That was my takeaway from the Justice League movie.

The Original Turn Based Strategy Game

Growing up, I was exposed to electronics and technology very young. My dad was a major techie, and from the age of 2 and 3, I was learning to use computers and play video games.

I was just discussing this with a friend of mine, who is a gamer, and he shared with me that his favorite childhood Christmas gift was the original Nintendo.  I replied that I was more outdoorsy as a kid and that for me, video games were for rainy days, when I was sick, or late at night when it was too dark to go outside.  However, I was fairly video game savvy as a kid, and to this day I take great pleasure in a long, strategic battle on Civilization VI.
I dislike being called a gamer (my husband tells me that I am), but in truth, while not an expert video gamer, I have been exposed to and playing video games on many different platforms for over thirty years.
When I was about three, I learned to play a game on the Atari called Utopia.  This was sort of the original turn-based strategy game that created the genre that now houses the Civilization series.  This game was from 1981, and had a fairly advanced way of allowing real-time strategy during turns.  The goal was to use resources to create different buildings and generate productivity to increase your score to win, but you worked against challenging circumstances, such as hurricanes or pirate ships that would aim to deter your efforts.  It was sort of a very early precursor to SimCity which I also loved as a kid!
I love strategy games.  At the age of six, I could competently play chess with my dad.  He taught me to play, but I also read a strategy book to learn different maneuvers.  I love to be challenged, I love strategic games, and I love competition.  I have probably been like this all of my life.  Video games allowed me to either play against an unknown opponent or AI instead of having to wait for someone to want to play with me.
I don\’t spend a lot of my time these days on video games (though on this winter break from school, I am trying to spend as much time on them as possible), but the truth remains that I was playing video games before many people even knew what they were.  It\’s not the type of pioneering effort that I brag about, but it definitely proves that my need to compete in a strategic way was born into me!

Favorite Childhood Christmas Gifts

It\’s funny how as adults we can always remember the couple of gifts we got as kids that meant the most to us.  Often time they weren\’t even the most expensive gifts we received, but they stand out in our minds as the most memorable.

When I was four, I got my first two-wheeled bike.  It had training wheels at first, which soon came off, and I remember being thrilled.  We were on our American travels at that time, living in a motorhome and moving from place to place and traveling around, so I learned to ride a bike alongside the Rio Grande, and in the deserts of Arizona.  I don\’t remember specifically asking for it or not, but it was a very happy day when I got my bike.  It wasn\’t just a thing…it was an experience!  It was an adventure. And my little legs peddled all over the place as fast as they could!

I had inherited a Cabbage Patch doll when I was a little girl, and when I was seven they had released the new version of the dolls that had different hair that you could style.  Well, I was smitten and I begged my parents relentlessly, it was all I wanted for Christmas that year.  On Christmas morning, I was overjoyed when I unwrapped my own little Jillian Paulette, which was the name on the Cabbage Patch birth certificate.  To this day, I have that doll carefully displayed in my house.  When I look at it, I am reminded of the hours I spent playing with her and taking her with me, on my bike, on my adventures.

When I was eleven, my parents gave me a small camera that used 110 cartridge film.  My first camera.  I had started babysitting around that time, and much of my earned money and allowance was spent buying film and getting it developed.  To this day, I have many of the very poorly taken photos that my friends and I took with that old camera. It was a small, purple, rectangular camera…almost the same shade of purple as the pistol my husband got me for my 30th birthday!  None of the pictures were good, but they preserved the memories of my childhood.

In every case, it wasn\’t the value of the gift, or the gift itself, but the memories that came from it that made it so memorable.  My parents and my husband have given me many great and wonderful gifts over the years, but those ones stand out so much for me because of the memories I have of them.  I think a lot of people stress out at this time of year trying to come up with the perfect gift for someone, but I don\’t think it needs to be that complicated.

I remember that scene at the end of the Santa Clause with Tim Allen and that weird weenie whistle that guy wanted as a kid!  It is not always the big shiny things that people want the most.

Inventing Words

I tend to be a stickler for the English language sometimes.  I hate when people use incorrect forms of words that have, since being so commonly misused, been added to the dictionary.  However, the English language is also very limiting in some ways and totally illogical in others.  Even Shakespeare invented his own words, so I have no problem now and then adding to my vocabulary words that my family has developed when the English language has left them wanting.

Below is a list of a few words that, uttered once in a moment of hilarity or desperation, have now become a part of my regular vocabulary:

Epis: this one was invented by my mom in a moment where she couldn\’t find the correct English word or phrase to suit her.  She had said something like, \”And what did I get?\” And there was a pause.  I assume she could have also said \”Diddly squat!\”  But that isn\’t what her mind reached for in that moment.  Instead, she said, \”Epis!\”  And we all knew what it meant when she said it.  And now, in our family, when we have zero, zilch, nothin\’, or ain\’t got no, we almost always now refer to it as epis!

Jahm: this one is so old that we aren\’t quite sure how it started, but we believe it was started by my brother.  It began with the phrase \”let\’s jam.\”  And from there, my brother fancied it up to be \”le jahm!\”  Perhaps, he thought, by saying it like this it sounds spicier!  Well, it eventually got shortened to just jahm and now, even our dogs know this command.  Jahm means, \”let\’s go!\”  When I say it to my dogs, they get up and follow me.  So, now it has not only entered the English language in my home, but my dogs also understand it.

Pema: this one is thirty years old and was started by my sister.  As kids, we all said weird things when we meant a different word.  I know as a very young toddler, I loved my swing, but I called it a gwang, but that never caught on.  My sister, however, referred to her spoon as a pema.  She had a gravelly voice and would say, \”Give me pema!\”  This made it into our vocabulary.  Many years later, my husband and I were living in a heavily Spanish speaking area.  He had heard us call a spoon a pema for years, and we never explained, and he never asked.  Well, he came home from work and said very indignantly to me, \”Pema is not Spanish for spoon!\”  And I just looked at him and said, \”I know.  What happened to you today?\”  We never did hear the story, but I have some strong suspicions about how that went down!

I could probably think of a dozen other words invented through funny stories, moments of misspeaking, or something we inherited from childhood.  There is an odd hypocrisy within myself where I will balk at someone misusing a common English word or phrase, and yet I will gleefully use my own invented words in casual conversation.  I chalk this up to one of the quirks of being a writer, knowing my motive is always to communicate in a way others can understand or relate to – while at the same time knowing full well I don\’t do this perfecly very often!

Christmas Cards

I love Christmas.  I always have.  I love everything about it from the twinkling lights to the dairy free eggnog that I drink.  I love having Christmas as an opportunity at work to be festive and spread cheer to my coworkers.  I own enough unique pieces of Christmas headgear to wear a different one to work everyday through the month of December, and I never miss a moment of Christmas fun!

I stopped sending most people traditional Christmas cards via the mail years ago and instead took my Christmas cheer digital, but for my coworkers, I have always enjoyed putting on a little something special.  I like to give a card with a hand written note, maybe some chocolate and a small Christmas ornament.  Nothing big, but just a small way to be festive and let them know I am thinking of them specifically in what I write or choose to give.

I find it very bizarre that every year I will get a few dozen cards in return from people, but many of them put no thought into them.  They buy a box of fifty generic store cards, and do not even address it to the receiver.  They autograph their name at the bottom, no personalized message, and toss them onto my desk.  Could be for me, or for anyone.  My name is nowhere on it.

When this happens, I wonder why people bother.  Christmas cards aren\’t for everyone, and that\’s fine.  Maybe they only do it because they feel obligated.  But in any case, when I get such a non-personal card I don\’t even display it at my desk.

I will be sitting down this weekend to take a moment to reflect on each person and wish them a Merry Christmas.  I will try to personalize it just for them, so they know they were in my thoughts as I wrote the card.  I found these adorable draw string gift bags that look like Santa\’s sack, and I will fill it with Christmas chocolate.  There will candy canes and other very small, very inexpensive things that just brighten up a moment, but let them know that I love being a part of the team.

My goal is to spread Christmas cheer, not Christmas indifference!

Benjamin Franklin: An American Life – Review

As part of my Day Zero Project goals, I am slowly working through the list of unlistened to audiobooks that I have (40 in all!) and have been working backward from longest to shortest.  I was so excited recently when Benjamin Franklin: An American Life by Walter Isaacson came up next.

I have always loved studying Benjamin Franklin.  When I was 20, I read his autobiography as part of a college class and came to understand Franklin as sort of the quintessential American ideal; curious, industrious, always striving toward self-improvement, always charming and affable.
While I admittedly have an affection for biographies in general (it is probably my favorite genre), this biography has been the easiest and most interesting to listen to by far.  The writer is clearly fascinated with his subject, and Franklin doesn\’t disappoint when it comes to quirks and stories to tell.
The biography recounts Franklin\’s early days and goes into great detail about his intellectual curiosities and the friendships that he struck up.  Many have called Franklin \”America\’s first philosopher\” but perhaps it was not that he was so very wise, but that he was so willing to make observations and write them down.  He was intelligent, for sure, and methodical in his approach to understanding scientific ideas, such as electricity, how calories are burned, and the invention of bifocals.  But more than intelligent, he was hungry for knowledge and often sacrificed food in order to buy books.
Benjamin Franklin was also sort of obsessive about personal morality.  As a young man, he sort of wavered on his stance about a diety, but he firmly believed in a strong moral character as the backbone for a good life and a healthy nation.  He kept a written personal contract of what he believed were essential good morals, called The Thirteen Virtues, where he lists among other things industriousness, frugality, and cleanliness.  That is not to say that he always took his own advice.  Having written his thirteen virtues as a young man, by the time he was in his later life, he had become sedentary and developed gout from overindulgence.
Franklin was also a charmer.  Even though there is no evidence of actual infidelity in his life after he married his wife, he had numerous flirtatious friendships, mostly with young women, where he walked a line between a doting father figure and a flirtatious courtier.  The letters that remain and that are quoted in this text are fascinating, as the courtly love play between him and these ladies is so elegantly written, always playful and witty, while still maintaining that fatherly affection as well.  These ladies were devoted to him in their writing, many of these friendships lasting decades with the women especially concerned with his opinion of their life choices.  He always gave his advice and offered his affection freely and enthusiastically.

Franklin was an avid learner, an inventor, an observer, a statesman, and someone who used grace and charm to relate to those around him.  His biography is as exciting as anyone could hope theirs to be.

This audiobook has been such an entertaining thing to listen to that I have even listened while on the treadmill, which is something I never do.  I highly recommend this book to anyone who likes history or just wants to read about America\’s first great philosopher!

Accepting Feedback

My coworkers and I often joke that \”feedback is a gift\” – and hence, every day is Christmas.  It is sometimes hard to put yourself out there knowing that with expression often comes criticism.  And the more passionate and important the expression is, the more fervent the feedback.  It\’s just the way it is.

I like to remind myself of Thomas Jefferson writing the Declaration of Independence.  Jefferson was sort of a dreamer, a visionary, but in some ways, he was a delicate soul.  I imagine Jefferson, thoughtfully and passionately writing the now famous and revered words of the Declaration.  He was a young man then, younger than I am now.  An educated man but still an idealist, he poured himself into this work.  
After completing it, he presented his work to the delegation and was met with numerous criticisms.   They struck out many sections of it, and in his later words expressed that he felt \”mutilated\” by the revisions.  Benjamin Franklin, sitting next to the much younger Jefferson, noticed his dejection at the criticism and proceeded to tell him the now famous \”John Thompson Hat Story\” to give some perspective of the impact of criticism on someone\’s work.
I think to myself when I receive unpleasant feedback on my work that a much brighter mind than mine once had to sit silently, raw with the sting of criticism, while a now legendary piece of writing was picked apart by a bunch of revolutionaries.
Feedback isn\’t always the gift we want to receive.  I never like being told that my work is flawed.  But criticism makes me better, and in the end, it is my choice to accept it.  Some may question my choice of words, but that doesn\’t mean I have to change them.  It only gives me the opportunity to rethink it and make a decision.
I must have one of those faces that people find very accepting of feedback, because I find that I get a lot of it.  But it fuels my perfectionism, not to try to appease people, but to craft what I create into something I am proud to stand behind.  More importantly, I have trusted sources that I can turn to in order to seek feedback.  Gentle, but honest feedback.  The type of feedback that makes me a better person, student, and writer.  
And that sort of feedback really is a gift!

Flashback Friday to MySpace!

Social media is such a misnomer to me because in having social media we often actually become less social. My observation, which seems to be backed up by people who actually study this, is that people who are immersed in social media forget to actually socialize in the moment with the people around them.
I have had social media in the past, beginning with something called Bolt way back in the late 90s, which I suppose would be considered social media now but I hadn\’t heard that term back then. Then we had MySpace, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc, and on and on, and now people socialize without ever speaking to other people.
One thing I have noticed since abandoning my social media is that I actually have developed a deeper bond with my friends. We write emails, and I seek to actually spend time with people face to face, rather than just randomly “like” their photos online.
I have also heard really terrible and disturbing things, such as people posting perfectly normal pictures of their children to social media very innocently, and those photos then being used by sick individuals. The internet has done great things, but it has enabled some terrible things as well.
This is why we can\’t have nice things!

However, in the spirit of “Flashback Friday” and the funny things that came out of social media, I found one of those old MySpace styled “get to know you” surveys that we all used to do. Even though some of it is pretty lame, I thought I would share it for a laugh. Some people take these things super seriously, and I am just going on the record as saying, this was meant to be fun and is not some manifesto of who I am – although I am pretty fun!
Last beverage you drank: Water
That song you listened to: Hello by Adele
Have you dated someone twice: Yes, my husband…he dumped me once…lol!
Favorite colors: Sage green or red
How many kids do you want: Eventually, I\’d like to adopt at least one
Do you want to change your name: No, except to add “Danger” in it or something!
What did you do for your last birthday: Spent time with my high school bestie!
What time does your alarm go off: 5am on weekdays, 8am on weekends
Name something you cannot wait for: Christmas!
Last time you saw your mother: Like 3 hours ago
Most visited web page: Google I suppose.
Do you have a crush on someone: My husband and Robert Downey Jr.
Piercings? My ears and my dogs howling voices!
Tattoos: Nope.
First surgery: Knee surgery when I was 18
Kissed a stranger? I\’ve kissed some weird people, yes. Strange people.
Gotten a speeding ticket? I can\’t run that fast!
Broken someone\’s heart: Hopefully not.
Been arrested? Nope.
Been rejected? A boy named Kyle once publicly rejected me. Lol!
Fallen for a friend? Only my best friend! And then I married him!
If you could go back in time, would you? Only if I could go back to like 1776. lol!
Are you insecure? We all have things, but I hope they don\’t define me.
How do you want to die? Either heroically, or in my sleep. LOL!
Do you type fast? Type yes, but I suck at texting.
Have you ever gone outside in pajamas? I regret to admit how many people have seen my jammies.
Did you dream last night? Yup, and it was not a good one.
Do you like Chinese food? I like ALL food.
Afraid of the dark? Nope.
Favorite weather? Hot with low humidity.
Ever smoked a cigar? Yes, but not successfully.
Do you own a gun? Yes, and mine is purple and gold.
Favorite hobby: Writing or working out
Favorite food: BLT\’s with dill pickles and guacamole
Fast food: Wendy\’s or A& W, but I rarely eat fast food
Current book: I am listening to an awesome Benjamin Franklin biography
Favorite board game: I love Trivial Pursuit and Wits & Wagers
Favorite sport: I love football, or did…when I had cable. LOL!
Favorite thing to wear: My Fitbit or my rings I guess
Favorite flower: Carnations
Morning or night person: Morning for sure!
Favorite TV show: Frasier or Downton Abbey
Favorite movie: Either Forrest Gump or Aladdin
Introvert or extrovert: Right down the middle
Ever stayed up for over 24 hours? Yes, once and for 42 hours and not for fun, it was awful.
Ever get your wisdom teeth out? Nope. They are keepers!
Pet peeve: Tedious conversation and people who are unhygienic
My best quality: I am fun
My worst quality: I\’m selfish and sometimes a bad listener.
Favorite quality in others: People who love to laugh and are passionate!

The Blessing of Lifelong Friendships

I was reflecting recently on those friendships that we have where we meet someone when we are young and somehow, through time and circumstances, we still find ourselves together.

My dad had a friend that lasted his whole life, from the time he was a young man until he passed away.  They were such different people, but they had a bond that held them together over the course of their lives.  They shared great stories and had great laughs and even when time or distance kept them apart, they could catch up right where they left off.

My husband has this also with a couple of his high school friends, but one especially.  They met when they were young and have stuck by one another ever since.  Even though life has taken them in totally different directions, they share a bond that makes explanations unnecessary.  That is the best thing about these types of friendships.  You know each other.  You give of yourself and you share in the enjoyment of friendship without the constant need for explanation.

That is such a relief.

I have been fortunate enough to have this myself.  I was the total opposite of popular when I was young, but in certain unique situations I have met and maintained close friendships for many years, and in some cases, for most of my life.

One little girl that I met on the playground when she was almost eight years old is now a cherished friend, a nurse, a wife, and a mother.  While we don’t have the same closeness that we did as children (she would walk to my house and slip right in the back door without ever having to knock), I know that whenever I need her, she is there for me.

Another girl that I met the year after that, an immigrant (a bond we now both share), we had a somewhat tumultuous youth together but ended up good friends.  I was twelve when I met her and we are still in close contact with one another, and she is one of those people I can just share my heart with and she is ready to share her thoughts with me.  Again, no explanations.  She has known me since childhood.  She knows who I am without me having to say it.

In the eleventh grade, I met the girl who later went on to become my best friend as adults.  Incidentally, I met her only a few months before I met my husband, and so she was close at hand to witness my early on infatuation with him.  With her, words are hardly needed at all.  While different in many ways, we share many similar passions, and I find we become delighted or outraged by the same things, especially when it comes to politics and humor.  She is the one I can just let my hair down with, and even though she has seen me at my very worst, she loves me.  Best yet, she reminds me when I can be better than I am behaving, and not every friend has that sort of fortitude.

In every case, I can be me without explanation.  I have no need to strive to be understood because I am.  These friendships provide relief for me, knowing there are people who will take advantage and demand an explanation out in the world, but from these women and in these long friendships, I have been blessed to have someone to turn to and without explanation receive so much support.


Friendship is often hard (like any relationship) and often grows best only through overcoming trials, but the proof is in the outcome when the work is put into it, it grows into something very worthwhile.