You always hear people talk about how we are getting less competent.  Most people can think of a grandparent or parent with an \”in my day\” story, referencing the hardship they had to overcome with significantly more competence than this generation ever could.

I also think of that when I study history, and you read about someone very accomplished; multi-lingual, well-read, innovative, community leader and public speaker.  I remember studying about Elizabeth I, and how at a young age she was an accomplished dancer and musician while also being considered a scholar, and then I\’d think to myself, \”What was I doing at 14?\”  And that was a bit disheartening!

But all of these things have been comparative, comparing one generation to another, one time to another, and excuses can be made and factors weigh in the balance.  But recently, I\’ve observed several things that just make you worry about the decline of this current culture!

My husband plays Family Feud on his phone, and as we all know, the answers are based on what \”the survey says.\”  Theoretically, then, there is a pool of people somewhere that were surveyed and that is where the top answers come from.  So, when my husband recently played the question, \”what are some things it is better to donate rather than throw away?\” it was troubling to see that blood and money both made the answer board!

Who throws their blood away!?

When one takes into context that this is a culture now struggling with how to get people to stop eating Tide Pods, it\’s not that surprising!

I get it, we are a busy people.  I spend at least 10 hours a week maintaining my small house (cleaning, laundry, etc), about 8-10 hours at least on school, plus 40 hours a week at work, 8-10 hours in commute, and I average 10-12 hours a week of physical exercise.  On top of that, I average seven hours of sleep per night for a total of 49 hours a week of sleep.  Just for laughs, let\’s give one hour a day to hygiene/personal maintenance (which is far more than it takes me)  So that comes out to a lot of hours each week earmarked for what essentially comprises life maintenance.  And I assume most people are similar, though perhaps they allocate their hours differently.

Even still, this leaves me with nearly thirty hours a week to invest in being a little smarter than someone who thinks eating Tide Pods are a good idea or that throwing blood away is even an option.

We are a busy and fast paced culture, but we have way too much free time on our hands to not be informed, involved and trying a little harder than this.  Given the blessing that we have of technology and modern convenience, we should have more time than ever before to be creative,  develop skills, learn new things, have meaningful interactions and spend time helping others in need, such as the people answering survey questions for Family Feud!

Perhaps this is all by design, though.  We have a highly entertained, uninformed, logey and compliant populace.  And the powers that be can operate relatively unopposed.

Someone made a comment to me recently that was a little bit prejudiced against pretty people – male or female.  There was an implication that pretty people don\’t \”get it,\” that they aren\’t that smart (or don\’t have to be), that they are a little self-involved.

I challenged that thinking with a story about a girl I became friends with in my very first semester of college back in 2001.  This girl was striking upon first impression.  She was half-Portuguese, half-Irish, and had amazingly thick, long black hair, porcelain white skin, and bright green eyes.  She was small and fit, fashionable, and just altogether beautiful to look at – probably the most beautiful woman I have ever seen face to face.

But that was only the first impression.  Getting to know her, she was very bright and intelligent, a hard worker and committed to both her job and her school work.  More than that, she was kind.  She never missed an opportunity to encourage someone.  She never spoke an unkind word about anyone, especially other women.  She was happy, and she was always thinking of others before herself, she had a great sense of humor without ever being sarcastic or vulgar, she was a sweetheart.

No one likes to have a label put on them, and I am sure my friend had been told that she was \”lucky\” because she wouldn\’t have to \”work as hard\” and so on.  And what a shame that is, to diminish everything else that makes up a person by writing them off based on their looks.  I don\’t believe we should do it to plain people, and we shouldn\’t do it to pretty people either.  When we assume someone\’s character based on their outside packaging we perpetuate a cycle of discrimination and stereotypes.

Some people are jerks.  Some people don\’t work hard.  But I try to get to know them before I make an assumption based on their outward appearance.

I regrettably lost touch with my friend back in 2013 when I deleted my Facebook, but the last I knew, she was a happily married new mother, and had a great career, and was just as kind and friendly as ever.  And when I think about her, of course, I remember how pretty she was.  But far more deeply I recall how she made us laugh, her generosity, and her genuine kindness toward everyone.

I have recently encountered a funny scenario where someone I know insisted that they had a new enemy and that they would be praying for her.  Only, I cannot understand how this person would view the other as an enemy when they\’d had only a minor miscommunication.  Even still, while I chuckled at this particular situation, the premise is true.

In a former job, I had a person there who despised me and went out of her way not only to make my day very uncomfortable but to an extent tried to sabotage my career.  While on the one hand, I felt very irritated by this, on the other hand, I felt sorry for her.  How sad to see anyone so consumed with hate.

I found myself praying more and more for this person.  Not that she would leave me alone and go away, but that she would not be so unhappy and hateful.  What affected me during the day when I had to encounter her was no doubt an affliction to her all the time and for all kinds of reasons.  I still pray for her.

It\’s been repeated often enough that it sounds trite, but it remains true anyway: hate and unforgiveness are the bars that hold a prisoner, and the prisoner is you.  And I feel a sincere pang of sadness for people who choose to live that way.

It is not to say that while praying for my \”enemies\” – or perhaps more appropriately, those that seek to do me harm – that I just lay down and let myself become a victim to them.  That is not the case, and I believe we need to take appropriate action when people begin to harass, stalk, or slander in ways that could become dangerous.  Sometimes people feel flattered to be an object of someone\’s hatred, but courting that sort of irrational hate is unhealthy and sometimes dangerous.  You cannot control how people will feel about you, but you can control your reaction to it.

There is no reason to tolerate any behavior from someone that poses a threat.  In my case, it was job-related, but even then I made it quite clear that I would seek formal action against any attempt to actually sabotage or harass me at work.

I don\’t believe in seeking vengeance, but I also don\’t believe in making myself a victim either.  I can be very patient, but I am not going to lose my livelihood.  I did not retaliate against the individual making my life miserable, I simply sought help through the appropriate channels. But I kept praying for this person as well.  Because while I felt irritated, I suspect the other person may have been losing sleep at night.  That is so terribly sad to me!

\”But to those who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.\” Luke 6:27-28

I have always been a morning person.  My husband teases me that I start getting grouchy after lunch time.  That is an exaggeration, but I definitely begin winding down around 9pm each night, but I wake up early each day, hungry for food and goals to accomplish!

I never really understood how much I value a pleasant morning routine that allows me to start my day well until recently.  Last year I started waking up an hour early once again to get my workout in before work each day, and that extra hour at the start of my day has been an unexpected delight to the rest of my day.

By the time I sit down at work each day, I\’ve already accomplished some things, which puts a little extra gas into my tank.  By the time work starts, I usually have 50-60 active minutes on my Fitbit.  By work time, I\’ve digested my breakfast and I\’m ready for second breakfast  (I\’m sort of like a hobbit with meal times!).  Oftentimes, before I leave for work, I\’ve taken care of household chores like laundry, dishes and trash.  I start my day invigorated, knowing I\’ll go home to an evening I can have to myself, chores done, workout logged, and well-deserving of my leisure time.

But my first item of the day, before even hopping out of bed, is to read my devotional on my phone.  It is always in my email when I wake up. It sets my attitude for my day. It grounds me and resets my priorities.  A few moments invested in God\’s Word, and I literally jump from my bed and rush to see my puppies and eat my breakfast.

\”Morning is an important time of day, because how you spend your morning can often tell you what kind of day you are going to have.\”  Lemony Snicket

I am not a crafty person.  I learned to cross stitch when I was 10 years old and enjoyed that but once I got bifocals at the age of 14 (yes, that\’s a fact!), and then my vision worsened, cross stitching became a headache to me, literally.  I have trouble differentiating shades of floss and my eyes just can\’t cope with the small details.  But, unfortunately, that is the only real art and craft sort of thing I could do.

I dreaded art class in school.  For me, papier-mache was a nightmare of goopy mess and dishevelled projects that I was ashamed to bring home to my mom and dad.  I could barely draw stick people.  I hated anything to do with sculpting or anything creative.  I\’m more of a math person, as boring as that sounds.

My sisters are both creative and skilled at different crafts.  In my home, I have different artwork hanging that was done for me by one of my sisters, she is an excellent painter.  My sisters can scrapbook and decorate and cook and decorate baking.  As kids, my mom got us a bead loom and they would all create bracelets on it…I\’m pretty sure I just made a mess with the beads.

My mom was also quite crafty.  Growing up, we had blankets in the house she had made, and she did some type of needlework to create framed art as well.  My mom is also a cook by trade and can be quite festive and creative in her culinary work.

So, I have been feeling a little bit left out.  I had made frozen pizzas in my oven the other day and when they came out my sister watched me cut them into slices and my lack of artistry even in something as mundane as that had her say, \”It\’s funny to watch you do things sometimes.\”  I am a danger to myself and others!

My friend recently started using a loom to make hats.  She has been practicing and has made quite a few and they have all turned out cute.  And now I am feeling especially envious.  I need a craft.  Not because I long to have dozens of hats or blankets piling up, but I need something to sit and keep me relaxed while I watch TV or I just fidget.

So, I have been investigating different types of crafts to do that do not require intricate detail and that can be done by someone as uncoordinated as I am.  I have started investigating learning to crochet.  I read a message board that said the beginner stuff is so easy a child can do it.

I am tempted, if nothing else, to show them how difficult it can actually be for a ham-fisted, thirty-something-year-old child like me!

\”Patience is not simply the ability to wait – it\’s how we behave while we\’re waiting.\”  – Joyce Meyer

Even in childhood, I was fairly outspoken.  I have never been one to hesitate taking action or to say the words that I instinctively feel.  To put it simply, I have been known in the past to have a bit of a temper.

The trouble is, there have been times where I have taken action or said words that, while they felt authentic to me, in the end, I regretted them.  They didn\’t help me achieve my goal, they put me further back.  They inadvertently created more trouble for me than I anticipated.  Sometimes, they were accompanied by the remorse of knowing I took the wrong course.

I have never regretted being patient, though.  This has been a battle throughout my adult life; a battle I have chosen for myself and have exercised diligently and in which I have found great joy.  Oddly enough, while patience can be perceived by many as a passive activity, the exercising of patience is often very rigorous.  Outwardly, there may be no action, but inwardly, my spirit is in battle.

An often frustrating component of patience in trials is the observations of others.  When I am enduring a set of difficult circumstances and I am practicing patience and enduring the battle, the worst thing is when someone else says to me, \”You should have….\” and then proceeds to tell me all of the action I should have taken and the words I should have fired back.  Often times they describe the very instinctive feelings I had myself, things I wanted to do and say, but that I held back from instead.  It\’s like putting a giant cake in front of a dieter and telling them they should eat it!  It\’s just not very nice.

Sometimes when I pray for guidance the answer comes back, \”Be patient.\”  That can be hard because when trouble strikes I want to do something.  In the moment.  But I have found when I seek patience, I find it.  And the more often I choose patience, the easier it becomes.  I would joke that I made a terrible waiter when I worked in a restaurant, but I have become an expert waiter in difficult circumstances.  It\’s like exercising a muscle.  The more you work it the stronger it gets.

I have found myself in a multifaceted set of difficult circumstances.  I feel like on multiple fronts, I am dealing with uncertainty and stress.  But I lean on the instruction of Romans 12:12, \”Be joyful in hope, patient in afflication, faithful in prayer.\”  And I find that I am able to sleep peacefully every night, even in the midst of trials.  Patience then is truly its own reward.