I\’ve had this conversation a few times in the last few weeks and felt like it made a good broader discussion. It came up because last month I rejoined Instagram and of course, friends soon started recommending the funny meme pages that I needed to follow.

I won\’t lie, some of them are pretty funny. But what I realized very quickly is how all of this tries to normalize self destructive behaviors such procrastination, excessive over eating, binge drinking, being late, poor sleep habits, etc.

I saw it mirrored in the behaviors of some people I care about, a friend of mine joking that that he is overweight and yet persists in overeating. A joke as if it is funny that obesity as we age is funny – when he has a family depending on him. Followed up with a funny meme or two, he thinks he has normalized a situation that deep down depresses him.

However, aside from the funny meme pages, I also started following a few highly successful entrepreneurs and a dozen or so incredibly fit individuals who eat and exercise well. Seeing these people play their lives out on social media – lives that more directly coincide with my personal goals – has normalized a lifestyle that is more challenging and rewarding.

These folks get up at 4am or 5am for their morning workouts – making my 5am workout seem ordinary rather than extraordinary. They measure their portions, ensure they are eating enough protein, watch their sugar intake, share delicious and yet healthful meals they are eating – making the fact that I have been counting my calories for years seem the norm, an expectation, rather than something over the top.

They mostly all completely cut out alcohol consumption because it directly opposes their health goals, making the fact that I also do not drink alcohol at all seem very normal.

These are folks who wake up early with a plan, execute hard all day, see progress and earn their sleep at night. By the way, they all shoot for at least 7 hour, because sleep is important for high achieving people. And my husband has long joked that I\’m the only adult he knows with a bedtime.

This is important. We need to surround ourselves in our personal lives and in the material we consume with things that reflect back to us the lifestyle we need to achieve our goals. For example, my sister runs everyday, she makes fitness a priority. Makes my daily workouts seem far less outstanding and a lot more expected when I align myself with her.

I don\’t want to hang around with people who think that I am \”amazing\” or \”super human\” because I wake up ready to go, never procrastinate, eat properly, or exercise vigorously. These people, in a very unintended way, are taking what I do and making it seem weird. They are not pushing me forward. They are in a way implying that compared to the average person I am abnormal and I should just tone it down a bit.

But I am creating a new normal for myself, where it is not at all weird that I know what my macro nutrients are today, or that I woke up at 4:45am and drank a liter of water while putting 5 miles in on the elliptical before work. Or that it is weird that I love my job and focus hard on it, my sister is my best example here as she is outstanding at what she does.

All my life, any time I have excelled or put in the effort I have been rejected or name called by the \”masses\” (aka classmates, coworkers, acquaintances) for being \”a keener\” or putting forth too much effort toward excellence, and I have been surrounded by people who\’s normal is mediocrity. But I realize now I feel sorry for those people. I was born for more than mediocrity, and I have begun surrounding myself more often with people for whom excellence is normal, and I believe this is something we all need to do.

I want to inspire others, but I also want to be inspired and encouraged, because I have a long way to go to reach my goals. Creating a new normal will help me with that.

About a month ago I excitedly pre-ordered my tickets to see the Downton Abbey movie, and last week was the big day. The theater was completely full, which stood out because I cannot remember the last time that theater was totally sold out.

I have been troubled lately by friends and acquaintances who refuse to discuss politics with me – perhaps because I am a \”crazy\” third party voter, or perhaps because I come to every discussion perfectly equipped with sources and facts – and they yet share things on social media that I find borderline offensive in some ways. But they don\’t want me to broach the subjects with them, as they believe it will harm our friendship. But somehow they think it will not harm the friendship to post these openly and yet close the door on healthy debate.

I am indeed a \”foolish third party voter\” – I do indeed \”waste\” my vote by believing in change, a different track and breaking free of a two party system where I believe the two parties aren\’t truly that different from one another. However, once long ago, I was a conservative that supported the Republican party, because I believed that party was most aligned with the values of freedom and personal responsibility. Those are my most important political values, no matter the topic. Environmentalism: we need freedom from the government and to take personal responsibility. Socialized programs/welfare: we need lower taxes, freedom from the government and need to take responsibility for our lives and our families, churches, etc.. The second amendment, health care, the military…I lean on every issue toward less government and more personal responsibility.

For a long time I believed the Republican party was aligned with those views. So it absolutely appalls me to see my current Republican supporting friends trying to silence the opposition, trying to ban certain personal practices in this country, trying to take a monopoly on the moral ground. This isn\’t freedom. This is their particular brand of what is best, and trying to shove it down someone else\’s throat under the guise of freedom. That isn\’t a republic, and it isn\’t even democracy…it is some disguised theocratic agenda to make every knee bend to their version of what is best.

Do I prefer this current executive administration? No. But I recognize the majority of voters (at least, electoral voters, which is the system we operate under) chose this and I respect that. I felt the same under the last administration. That still allows me to be (very) concerned about policies, it still allows me the freedom to voice my dissenting opinion, but I do so recognizing that this was the voters\’ choice.

When Obama was president, his supporters took a tone of, \”the voters have spoken, you need to suck it up!\” And the right was extremely resentful. But the right has taken the exact same tone now that Trump is president, learning nothing from their own experience on the other side.  So what do I foresee for the 2020 election? Regardless of the winner, I know it\’ll be more of the same: division, disrespect and not one inch closer to making this country a better place. Doesn\’t matter who wins.

I do not lose heart. I do not believe we are born to no purpose. I will continue to work hard, stand up for what I believe in, throw my support behind causes that are important to me, stand heartily for freedom even when sometimes that means I am forced to contend with decisions that I disagree with. Because even though how one person chooses to utilize their freedom may astound, offend, or even disgust me, I respect and will defend their right to do so.

As I hope others would do for me.

I do not want to silence, ban, deport or lock up the people with whom I disagree. I disagree with nearly every friend and family member I have on most points of politics, but I want them to exercise their right to express themselves. I even want to learn from them and understand them even when I think they are wrong. I do not believe the solution to our nations\’ problems is to silence, ban, regulate, create laws against or lock up people with whom we don\’t see eye to eye.

And it astounds me that I have friends who find my line of thinking so abhorrent that they won\’t even allow discussion.

\”I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it.\” – Voltaire

At some point during my time in university, as part of my leadership courses, we were asked to take the Myers Briggs (MBTI) test, which asks some questions to determine a little about your personality type, how you communicate, and how you see the world.

This is not a test meant to put people into boxes. It is meant to shed a some light on how we might better communicate with one another after understanding them and ourselves a little better. It\’s not a road map to our lives; it\’s a mirror to ourselves and a window to others, allowing for better understanding between people.

There are a few places to take this test online, the official MBTI test is here, which is what I took while in school, or also this one that is a little more engaging and fun!  What you\’ll surmise quickly is that there are 16 different types and it comes down to four letters.  My type: ISTP (introverted-sensing-thinking-perceiving).

This image helps a bit understanding the different components of how these types are made up. And once you\’ve taken the test, maybe you\’ll be a bit surprised at how you came out, or maybe you\’ll be amazed at how on target it was! I recommend you take it, and share with your friends and family!

I actually came out very borderline introvert/extrovert, tipping slightly over to the I. This made a lot of sense to me once I thought about it. People who know me at work, for example, think I am very social and extroverted, and I can absolutely \”turn it on\” and be sociable and engaging when I am with people. However, there is a certain cost to me in doing that. It exhausts me over time, I need alone time to refresh and recover. My close family will know I need a lot of alone time, prefer working independently and when taxed with a lot of socialization, I sleep a lot afterwards!

Some other traits that come from my type, often called a Virtuoso or a Craftsman, are that I am logical, aloof and inexpressive, practical, insensitive and insubordinate, rebellious and adventuresome, that I can be easily bored and very adaptable. I feel like all of these things very much sum up some of my most stand out traits.

When dealing with an ISTP, you have to give them a little space. It takes a long time to get to know us deeply, and for people who like to live in the abstract world (or in the past!), ISTPs will get bored. We like the here and now, the tangible and practical, we like to take on challenges and solve problems. In romantic relationship, we need a lot of freedom and while we can be enjoying the adventure and physical nature of a relationship, it takes a long time to get an ISTP to commit (this hit home for me, I knew my husband for almost 7 years before I married him).

In the workplace, ISTPs do not like to be micromanaged! They crave flexibility and variety, new challenges and the freedom to work them, and if this is achieved ISTPs are very loyal employees. ISTPs are reserved and rational, but we do have that fun, spontaneous side, and that can make us a fun and helpful coworker to have! Speak to us directly, and if you need our help come prepared to be flexible to our own way of giving that help. As leaders (and ISTPs do make good leaders, but account for barely 4% of leaders total), we give space, we empower, we allow people to learn and think for themselves. We show fariness and impartiality to our subordinates, but we can be perceived as cold and distant because we are not the hugging types!

Understanding this about me, whether you\’re trying to develop a business relationship with me or be a friend or sell me something all tells you a bit better how to get at me in a way that makes me respond. Be direct. Be flexible with me. Use logic to persuade me, not emotions.

This test is not a replacement for getting to know people but rather a but of a guide to help communicate better in different settings. The reason we took this in my leadership classes was to learn to build dynamic teams and suiting different tasks to the strengths of people on that team. It was quite effective and I have since used it in many other situations as well!

It\’s pretty much common sense to agree people shouldn\’t drink and drive. Yet, people do and if you pull up your county bookings online (public record) you can find people are getting charged with this everyday.

The past few weeks I have been engaged in some training initiatives for my new role at work. This training has involved a lot of new material and experiences and has required me to interact with tons of people I don\’t know and from business segments to which I am still pretty unfamiliar. When I got home from work last night, after a long week or learning, interacting and so much socialization, I told my sister that it is hard to imagine myself ten or fifteen years ago having the confidence to do this.

In my youth and early adulthood, I gave very little concern to the environment. I didn\’t trouble myself over people who littered, or my excessive consumption of single use plastic. I didn\’t worry about what pesticides did to the ecosystem. I didn\’t care. 

I was having an amusing recollection the other night, discussing with my mom how sensitive I am to my house being untidy.  I know precisely what needs to be done, and I truly have trouble sleeping if I know there are dishes piled up in the sink!

My husband does not share this problem. He is very content, very comfortable whether the house is spotless or a little untidy. However, if we have a cupboard door in need of repair or something wrong with an appliance, it bothers him tremendously. A duct-tape solution does not appease him, he wants a true fix. And it is funny to me that I am not troubled by those things.

I remember the house I grew up in very well. It was less than 1000 square feet, one functional bathroom, 6 people in the house. Cramped quarters is an understatement. The house was built in the 1930s and had all the beautiful charms of a pre-WWII home, with stucco and archways and high windows. It also, however, wasn\’t built for modern inventions such as dishwashers or high powered modern day washing machines.

Each time we ran the dishwasher, we had to pull it from it\’s spot (on wheels) and pull it to the sink, connect the hose to the faucet and let it run from there.  Each time we ran the washing machine, on the rinse cycles when the washer would drain, we would have to run to \”catch\” it in time, to lift the lid and let it slowly release into the basement drain – left unchecked, the entire basement would flood with rinse water!

Our front door \”broke\” one time – an old door, heavy, with an old handle on it – and it broke in such a way that it couldn\’t lock correctly. My parents worried more about feeding their kids than getting a new door, so they improvised. They took a kitchen knife and inserted it into the door in such a way that it \”locked\” the door for us. From that day on, we were backdoor people. I can\’t recall ever having a friend come in through our front door.

I lived in a basement bedroom almost my entire childhood, and early on the heavy old knob to the door broke and couldn\’t reconnect. So essentially I had to take the long side (the piece with the knob and the metal spoke that went through the door) and have that on hand at all times to get in and out of my bedroom.  If I misplaced it, well, I soon discovered a pair of scissors could break me into my bedroom just fine. Years passed, friends certainly thought this was weird, but I never once took exception to having to do this. It worked, and that was all that mattered to me.

My husband would look at all of these things now as a huge inconvenience to our lives if we were having to manage them now, and truthfully, I probably would as well.  But I often think back to those times as the times where I most learned about resourcefulness.  When something goes wrong in my current house, I can usually jimmy together some type of quick fix to make things work until we can get a true repair. And the funny thing is, they still don\’t bother me to do them.

I am not sure if resourcefulness is something you are born to be or if you can become it, but I do believe my parents example of demonstrating practical resourcefulness rubbed off on all their children. Perhaps we learned it by example. But I am thankful that I can see a problem, and see past the tools at hand to the creative approach that maybe isn\’t a true fix, but something that can suffice until a fix can be found or afforded.

Maybe we are really the poster children of the \”you might be a redneck if…\” descriptions, but I think we make ourselves pretty useful when disaster strikes and all you have is rope and tape. I\’m confident that we can find a way!

I\’m about to make a career change at work that is unlike anything I have tried before.  I am leaving the side of the business where I have established myself for ten years, where I have made connections and learned functions and developed different skills, and I am moving into a sales role.

Ten years ago, it would have been mind boggling to me to even consider such a change. I have always felt that I was far too wired for internal business, learning and working inside of operations. However, in the last few years I have worked more and more closely with our sales team, built relationships with them and seen how they work, and I began to speculate if this was something I could enjoy. Where hard work could result in personal reward, where I could be, in a small way, the master of my own fate.  I see my sister do this and excel and I became curious and very open to the idea.

I have recently had some change within the function I have been working within in my current role and it had freed up some time.  I had requested some additional projects.  My ask: I have worked hard and proven myself to worthy of meaningful and challenging work.  I want work that makes a difference.  I want work that utilizes and challenges my ability to have direct conversations and fix and organize processes.

The result of this ask put me into some project that while meaningful and important were monotonous.  Administrative in nature and not challenging. Tasks that other people might be better geared for, quieter people, wallflowers who just want to complete the task at hand, people with no inclination to make a difference. That isn\’t me.

Then the opportunity came up for this change. Am I nervous? I will admit that yes, I have apprehension mixed in with my excitement. It is new, and I will be measured against people, including my sister, who have been very successful and have excellent reputations. I visualize what it will take for me to have that as well.

As I told my current boss, who has been very supportive of my change in direction, when I have those lingering moments of uncertainty, wondering if I have the courage to take on this new challenge, I think about the monotony I was facing. And in that, I find the courage.

I would rather be scared, overworked and shaken up than be bored. I would rather have to scramble to learn than be left stuck in a corner entering data and not making impactful change and building relationships. In all of my change management courses in university they discussed the natural tendency of humans to fear change. I fear boredom far more.

I have sought out and requested meaningful work, I have made a case that I have earned this right. I feel that some leaders have squandered an opportunity to make me an asset to them, but I have found a new role that I will soon start, with new challenges and new leadership. And I am confident that in this role, despite initial doubts and knowledge gaps, that I can truly make a difference to our clients and our organization in this new role.

It is a lesson: do not ignore the folks in your teams who ask for meaningful work. It is probably not a common request, and if you pass up the chance, those folks might just pass on by and find a challenge worthy of their ambition!

I am not a movie buff by any means, but I wanted to share my thoughts on the new Aladdin movie that is currently in theaters. Prior to seeing it myself, I had seen some reviews, some good but some pretty bad.

Full disclosure, the 1992 animated version of Aladdin is one of my all time favorite movies – probably in my top 3.  So I went into this reboot with excitement and also the fear that it would ruin both movies for me!

The original Aladdin\’s great triumph is of course the amazing talent of Robin Williams as the Genie. You realize how uniquely important his talent was when you watch the sequel movie The Return of Jafar. His replacement for Genie in this movie is none other than Dan Castellaneta, renowned of The Simpsons – however, even his talent cannot bring Genie to life the way Robin Williams does.

So, how difficult it must have been for Will Smith to step into the live action shoes of the Genie, where he is not only the voice but the face of a character originally made famous by Williams. I\’ve read mixed reviews on this but my opinion on the matter – which I will consider as expert since I doubt anyone alive has seen the original Aladdin as many times I have – is that Will Smith does a great job being his own Genie. He doesn\’t try to be or replace Robin Williams, and that is why he does a great job of being his own Genie.

The politically incorrect tones of the 1992 version of the movie troubled some people – not me, I am not easily troubled by fictional stories – and the recent version tries to right some of these wrongs.  Some of the lyrics are changed in the songs to be more PC, and the cast has been appropriately chosen to be more reflective of the theme. However, some people still find issue with this, that they tried to correct and modernize but they didn\’t go far enough or also that adjusting the story line doesn\’t correct the mistakes of the past.  These people need to get a grip (as Iago says in the original film!). It\’s a fictional story, stop being so damn offended by everything. 

The cast does a great job!  Mena Massoud is a lovable Aladdin and Naomi Scott is a gorgeous Jasmine – and a great singer too! The magic carpet ride scene to the song \”A Whole New World\” is perfectly thrilling with the actors singing the song.

It isn\’t the same as 1992\’s Aladdin.  The story line is mostly the same (no spoilers!) but there are updates.  There are hilarious new scenes. There are new jokes. There are some new takes on the old details. If you go in wanting it to be the live action replica of the 1992 version, you\’ll be disappointed. But if you let this movie stand on it\’s own, you will enjoy it!